The "Will it fit?" thread

[anna-burns]

For many it begins the moment Mom or Dad first releases our hands, eyes shining as we step into the strange and often unfamiliar surroundings of pre-school. Walking reluctantly away, this trickle of self-doubt may swell into a flood of uncertainty. Will I get along with others? Will I be met with kindness and warmth? Will I be accepted?

Will I fit in?

Some of us may have paused, eyebrows raised in concern and hesitation, looking back over our shoulders toward an equally reluctant parent, seeking that final little push that says:

Go on. It’s going to be okay.

And for most of us, it is just that – okay. Between victories and failures, years pass and we may still hear that quiet voice whispering its questions from a place we try not to visit. On some conscious level we wish we didn’t care so much about acceptance, about fitting in. Our hope is that individuality is rewarded and others see us for who we really are, not some cookie cutter projection of a certain sex, shape or complexion. And to stand out in some unique or distinguishing way we rebel against the so-called norm because it feels good – hell, it feels great! – and it works, albeit for a little while. But the paradox is always present… we want to be treated the same yet we often yearn to be different.

Eventually we find ourselves at the doorstep of our careers, assessing and being assessed, attempting to apply what little information we can gleam to determine if this organization is the place we belong. If these are the people we want to surround ourselves with. If this is the best use of our education, our skills, our energy and our time. And if we want to earn the trust and confidence of those in power, we desperately want to fit in and meet all their spoken and unspoken expectations.

It’s only later that we might realize that fitting in may be more than we had bargained for. And then the tradeoffs and rationalizations begin.

So what choices do you have as you balance earning a living against your desire to be you – the real you – in a work environment that both rewards and expects unquestioning conformity? For many, a double life is a real and pragmatic approach, the “work you” showing up when you’re expected to show up, expressing the right emotions for each situation you face and participating in a process that you truly believe (hope?) was borne less of design and more of necessity. But outside of the office? You’re the genuine article, the one who has untapped talents, passions and possibilities, the one who wishes there was some way of earning a paycheck for what truly sustains you.

But a double life can be exhausting. Employers are creeping more and more into your personal life, tethering you to always-on devices whose Pavlovian beeps and buzzes immediately return us to the trancelike state of work. The work you. The fitting in you. The one that earns the paycheck that provides food, and childcare, and vacations and a million other ways of incentivizing conformity. And we do it because everyone does it, and to not do it is irresponsible, childish and self-destructive. So we are told.

So you suppress the real you, push it down somewhere deep and tell it to stop bothering you with its ridiculous hopes and dreams. And one day, you forget the difference between the two “you”s, that this other you even existed.

I’ve spent my entire career watching the bright light of ideation, creativity and individuality be largely snuffed out by the machinery of the organizations we tirelessly serve. Instead of handing out performance reviews rewarding you for doing exactly what you were hired to do, let’s pass out two matches – one to burn the handbook that tells us that what’s expected is to be applauded and a second to spark true and sustainable change.

Take my hand as we walk into strange and unfamiliar surroundings of rewarding and promoting individuality in the workplace. And when your organizations pause, eyebrows raised in concern and hesitation, looking back over their shoulders with reticence, seeking that final little push, we can say:

Go on. It’s going to be okay.

[AlphaSnacks]

......

[W.O.W. 370Z]

The spammers on this site are ridiculous. Never seen so many on a forum before.

[RandyD]

Originally Posted by Arnold K.

......

[RandyD]

Originally Posted by anna-burns

For many it begins the moment Mom or Dad first releases our hands, eyes shining as we step into the strange and often unfamiliar surroundings of pre-school. Walking reluctantly away, this trickle of self-doubt may swell into a flood of uncertainty. Will I get along with others? Will I be met with kindness and warmth? Will I be accepted?

Will I fit in?

Some of us may have paused, eyebrows raised in concern and hesitation, looking back over our shoulders toward an equally reluctant parent, seeking that final little push that says:

Go on. It’s going to be okay.

And for most of us, it is just that – okay. Between victories and failures, years pass and we may still hear that quiet voice whispering its questions from a place we try not to visit. On some conscious level we wish we didn’t care so much about acceptance, about fitting in. Our hope is that individuality is rewarded and others see us for who we really are, not some cookie cutter projection of a certain sex, shape or complexion. And to stand out in some unique or distinguishing way we rebel against the so-called norm because it feels good – hell, it feels great! – and it works, albeit for a little while. But the paradox is always present… we want to be treated the same yet we often yearn to be different.

Eventually we find ourselves at the doorstep of our careers, assessing and being assessed, attempting to apply what little information we can gleam to determine if this organization is the place we belong. If these are the people we want to surround ourselves with. If this is the best use of our education, our skills, our energy and our time. And if we want to earn the trust and confidence of those in power, we desperately want to fit in and meet all their spoken and unspoken expectations.

It’s only later that we might realize that fitting in may be more than we had bargained for. And then the tradeoffs and rationalizations begin.

So what choices do you have as you balance earning a living against your desire to be you – the real you – in a work environment that both rewards and expects unquestioning conformity? For many, a double life is a real and pragmatic approach, the “work you” showing up when you’re expected to show up, expressing the right emotions for each situation you face and participating in a process that you truly believe (hope?) was borne less of design and more of necessity. But outside of the office? You’re the genuine article, the one who has untapped talents, passions and possibilities, the one who wishes there was some way of earning a paycheck for what truly sustains you.

But a double life can be exhausting. Employers are creeping more and more into your personal life, tethering you to always-on devices whose Pavlovian beeps and buzzes immediately return us to the trancelike state of work. The work you. The fitting in you. The one that earns the paycheck that provides food, and childcare, and vacations and a million other ways of incentivizing conformity. And we do it because everyone does it, and to not do it is irresponsible, childish and self-destructive. So we are told.

So you suppress the real you, push it down somewhere deep and tell it to stop bothering you with its ridiculous hopes and dreams. And one day, you forget the difference between the two “you”s, that this other you even existed.

I’ve spent my entire career watching the bright light of ideation, creativity and individuality be largely snuffed out by the machinery of the organizations we tirelessly serve. Instead of handing out performance reviews rewarding you for doing exactly what you were hired to do, let’s pass out two matches – one to burn the handbook that tells us that what’s expected is to be applauded and a second to spark true and sustainable change.

Take my hand as we walk into strange and unfamiliar surroundings of rewarding and promoting individuality in the workplace. And when your organizations pause, eyebrows raised in concern and hesitation, looking back over their shoulders with reticence, seeking that final little push, we can say:

Go on. It’s going to be okay.

[Rusty]

Somebody got some deep issues.

[Volk Z]

I wonder if that spammer is somehow related to Dickie-Burns?
Reminds me of a kid I went to school with named Richard Allred Jr. Aka Little Dickie Allred! Ahaha

[RoadZter]

WTF?

[rebe945]

Can you help me? I have a stock setup in 18s. 18x8 and 18 x9 with 225/50 frt and 245/45 rear. I like the Forgestars f-14s but the sizeis 18x8.5 and 18x9.5, also a 18x9 available. Would this go. How would the stretch look. Bad, good or ugly?. Offsets are26 frt and 26 rear with the 9.5 and 20 with the 18x9. Otherwise i may just go with 19s. Thanks

[A 2 Z]

Ok here is my question. Would 255/35-19 front and 305/30-19 rear fit the stock OEM rays? Im looking to get the tires first then switch them to the new wheels im buying around spring. Measurements for the new wheels are 19x9.5 +20 front and 19x11 +18 rear.

So... will it fit?

[a355725]

Originally Posted by anna-burns

For many it begins the moment Mom or Dad first releases our hands, eyes shining as we step into the strange and often unfamiliar surroundings of pre-school. Walking reluctantly away, this trickle of self-doubt may swell into a flood of uncertainty. Will I get along with others? Will I be met with kindness and warmth? Will I be accepted?

Will I fit in?

Some of us may have paused, eyebrows raised in concern and hesitation, looking back over our shoulders toward an equally reluctant parent, seeking that final little push that says:

Go on. It’s going to be okay.

And for most of us, it is just that – okay. Between victories and failures, years pass and we may still hear that quiet voice whispering its questions from a place we try not to visit. On some conscious level we wish we didn’t care so much about acceptance, about fitting in. Our hope is that individuality is rewarded and others see us for who we really are, not some cookie cutter projection of a certain sex, shape or complexion. And to stand out in some unique or distinguishing way we rebel against the so-called norm because it feels good – hell, it feels great! – and it works, albeit for a little while. But the paradox is always present… we want to be treated the same yet we often yearn to be different.

Eventually we find ourselves at the doorstep of our careers, assessing and being assessed, attempting to apply what little information we can gleam to determine if this organization is the place we belong. If these are the people we want to surround ourselves with. If this is the best use of our education, our skills, our energy and our time. And if we want to earn the trust and confidence of those in power, we desperately want to fit in and meet all their spoken and unspoken expectations.

It’s only later that we might realize that fitting in may be more than we had bargained for. And then the tradeoffs and rationalizations begin.

So what choices do you have as you balance earning a living against your desire to be you – the real you – in a work environment that both rewards and expects unquestioning conformity? For many, a double life is a real and pragmatic approach, the “work you” showing up when you’re expected to show up, expressing the right emotions for each situation you face and participating in a process that you truly believe (hope?) was borne less of design and more of necessity. But outside of the office? You’re the genuine article, the one who has untapped talents, passions and possibilities, the one who wishes there was some way of earning a paycheck for what truly sustains you.

But a double life can be exhausting. Employers are creeping more and more into your personal life, tethering you to always-on devices whose Pavlovian beeps and buzzes immediately return us to the trancelike state of work. The work you. The fitting in you. The one that earns the paycheck that provides food, and childcare, and vacations and a million other ways of incentivizing conformity. And we do it because everyone does it, and to not do it is irresponsible, childish and self-destructive. So we are told.

So you suppress the real you, push it down somewhere deep and tell it to stop bothering you with its ridiculous hopes and dreams. And one day, you forget the difference between the two “you”s, that this other you even existed.

I’ve spent my entire career watching the bright light of ideation, creativity and individuality be largely snuffed out by the machinery of the organizations we tirelessly serve. Instead of handing out performance reviews rewarding you for doing exactly what you were hired to do, let’s pass out two matches – one to burn the handbook that tells us that what’s expected is to be applauded and a second to spark true and sustainable change.

Take my hand as we walk into strange and unfamiliar surroundings of rewarding and promoting individuality in the workplace. And when your organizations pause, eyebrows raised in concern and hesitation, looking back over their shoulders with reticence, seeking that final little push, we can say:

Go on. It’s going to be okay.

hahahaha...........wtf was this all about??

[Unique_Z]

Originally Posted by A 2 Z

Ok here is my question. Would 255/35-19 front and 305/30-19 rear fit the stock OEM rays? Im looking to get the tires first then switch them to the new wheels im buying around spring. Measurements for the new wheels are 19x9.5 +20 front and 19x11 +18 rear.

So... will it fit?

Those sizes you mentioned will fit, but beware that 305s feels a lil squishy for the oems. If i were you though i will do the front as you mentioned but keep the rears with 295/30/19. That will make it look a bit stretched but balances the fronts. And if you go lower, the better it looks. as of your offset that will look flush. Good luck

[Unique_Z]

Originally Posted by rebe945

Can you help me? I have a stock setup in 18s. 18x8 and 18 x9 with 225/50 frt and 245/45 rear. I like the Forgestars f-14s but the sizeis 18x8.5 and 18x9.5, also a 18x9 available. Would this go. How would the stretch look. Bad, good or ugly?. Offsets are26 frt and 26 rear with the 9.5 and 20 with the 18x9. Otherwise i may just go with 19s. Thanks

the brake clearance shrinks a little. i'll just do 19 if i were you

[cjr1881]

Enkei GTC01 20"x9.5 offset either 38/40mm front on 285/35/20 Toyo Proxes R888
rear 10.5x offset 18mm 315/30/20
I'd rather go with 40 so the front tires don't stick out more than the rear. I don't want to rub on the control arm either. Anyone know for sure?

[cjr1881]

Originally Posted by anna-burns

For many it begins the moment Mom or Dad first releases our hands, eyes shining as we step into the strange and often unfamiliar surroundings of pre-school. Walking reluctantly away, this trickle of self-doubt may swell into a flood of uncertainty. Will I get along with others? Will I be met with kindness and warmth? Will I be accepted?

Will I fit in?

Some of us may have paused, eyebrows raised in concern and hesitation, looking back over our shoulders toward an equally reluctant parent, seeking that final little push that says:

Go on. It’s going to be okay.

And for most of us, it is just that – okay. Between victories and failures, years pass and we may still hear that quiet voice whispering its questions from a place we try not to visit. On some conscious level we wish we didn’t care so much about acceptance, about fitting in. Our hope is that individuality is rewarded and others see us for who we really are, not some cookie cutter projection of a certain sex, shape or complexion. And to stand out in some unique or distinguishing way we rebel against the so-called norm because it feels good – hell, it feels great! – and it works, albeit for a little while. But the paradox is always present… we want to be treated the same yet we often yearn to be different.

Eventually we find ourselves at the doorstep of our careers, assessing and being assessed, attempting to apply what little information we can gleam to determine if this organization is the place we belong. If these are the people we want to surround ourselves with. If this is the best use of our education, our skills, our energy and our time. And if we want to earn the trust and confidence of those in power, we desperately want to fit in and meet all their spoken and unspoken expectations.

It’s only later that we might realize that fitting in may be more than we had bargained for. And then the tradeoffs and rationalizations begin.

So what choices do you have as you balance earning a living against your desire to be you – the real you – in a work environment that both rewards and expects unquestioning conformity? For many, a double life is a real and pragmatic approach, the “work you” showing up when you’re expected to show up, expressing the right emotions for each situation you face and participating in a process that you truly believe (hope?) was borne less of design and more of necessity. But outside of the office? You’re the genuine article, the one who has untapped talents, passions and possibilities, the one who wishes there was some way of earning a paycheck for what truly sustains you.

But a double life can be exhausting. Employers are creeping more and more into your personal life, tethering you to always-on devices whose Pavlovian beeps and buzzes immediately return us to the trancelike state of work. The work you. The fitting in you. The one that earns the paycheck that provides food, and childcare, and vacations and a million other ways of incentivizing conformity. And we do it because everyone does it, and to not do it is irresponsible, childish and self-destructive. So we are told.

So you suppress the real you, push it down somewhere deep and tell it to stop bothering you with its ridiculous hopes and dreams. And one day, you forget the difference between the two “you”s, that this other you even existed.

I’ve spent my entire career watching the bright light of ideation, creativity and individuality be largely snuffed out by the machinery of the organizations we tirelessly serve. Instead of handing out performance reviews rewarding you for doing exactly what you were hired to do, let’s pass out two matches – one to burn the handbook that tells us that what’s expected is to be applauded and a second to spark true and sustainable change.

Take my hand as we walk into strange and unfamiliar surroundings of rewarding and promoting individuality in the workplace. And when your organizations pause, eyebrows raised in concern and hesitation, looking back over their shoulders with reticence, seeking that final little push, we can say:

Go on. It’s going to be okay.

You don't need our permission to tell off your boss or quit and try to be an artist or whatever your intentions are.
Good read though, I'm perfectly fine with people having double lives including myself. Things would get out of hand if people acted like they do at home