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Best GTR Craigslist Ad Ever!!!!

"Not now chief, I'm in the f'cking zone."

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Old 11-04-2011, 12:21 AM   #31 (permalink)
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"Not now chief, I'm in the f'cking zone."
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Old 11-04-2011, 12:24 AM   #32 (permalink)
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also kinda reminds me of this guy

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADqAWUoVtbs


....







Although not as much
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Old 11-04-2011, 12:28 AM   #33 (permalink)
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He's one hell of a trooper to keep going through all that
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Old 11-04-2011, 12:29 AM   #34 (permalink)
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Figured somebody should future proof this thread
Quote:
Originally Posted by Skyline GTR Craigslist Add
This isn't your normal skyline. This motherfcker is the skyline God would drive if he wasn't busy doing God sh*t like making tsunamis and crap. Its set up to go fast, and go fast sideways. Who doesn't like to get sideway?! Terrorists, thats who. Are you a terrorist? No? Then you need this car.

Handling? This car handles like a junior executive CEO. Go around corners like the devil himself is chasing you, and not give a fck.

Whats that? You like drifting? Well I've got some great god d@mn news for you. This car was a drift project of mine, and the last owner was planning on making it a drift machine too. Interior is for ******* so we got rid of it. Manly as fck. It literally oozes testosterone. So much so that its puddling up in the back.

Seats? this cocks*cker has got two. One for you, and one for the hot @ss broad thats gunna be all upons your **** after you buy this car. You're a girl? Sh*t works both ways. One seat for you, and one seat for that hot @ss dude you've been trying to hook up with for weeks. Deal with it,sh*ts getting serious.

Stereos and AC are for hippies. Fortunately this car has neither. Oh look at me, I like listen to Simon and Garfunkel and think about puppies. F*ck that. The only noises you're gunna be hearing is the ultra manly engine noises coming from this sweet turbocharged, intercooled, 24 valve inline 6. Sh*ts getting real, real f*cking fast.

This car has got a bright orange ebrake handle (b*tches love orange) with a drift button for those super ultra megahellatastic bar room brawler ebrake lockers. F*ck. Yes.

Now, I'll be honest. The wheels are a little lackluster, although everyones gunna be so focused on your super gangster drifting that nobody is going to give a f*ck about your sh*tty stock 16s. Don't worry, I've got you fcking covered. Its like we're in Vietnam and you just got ambushed by Charlie. Don't worry, friend, I've got your fcking back and I blow charlie to kingdom fcking come. For an extra $450 I can throw in some added p*ssy magnets for wheels, just don't come crawling back to me complaining that you're getting TOO much vajayjay. Bright fcking green 18s. Greens not your thing? Super legit silver 18s. Done like dinner.

This car has got 1.5 metric f*ck tons of awesome parts. Bride, Greddy, Brembo, the list doesn't f*cking END. It just keeps going and going, like the energizer bunny on speed.

You like going fast? Ever tried to outrun 24 police cars and 3 helicopters? You need this car. It will go so fcking fast that you may very well go back in time. It happened to me once. Just once, but it was fcking rad. Its like someone took a rocket and opened its mouth and poured steroids down its throat and and threatened to kill its family if it wasn't the fastest motherfcker you've ever driven.

I get it. You're busy, I'm busy, lets not waste time. If you're interested send me a message and I'll get back to you ASAP. You send me a message, I send you one right back. Thats how this works.

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Old 11-04-2011, 12:31 AM   #35 (permalink)
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Lol hilarious ad. Id love to meet the cut-up who wrote that.
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Old 11-04-2011, 12:35 AM   #36 (permalink)
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Quote:
super ultra megahellatastic bar room brawler ebrake lockers. F*ck. Yes

BEST LINE EVER!
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Rooster is a lot like Socrates, except with far more b*tches, far less manservants, and a powdery white mustache.
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Old 11-04-2011, 12:49 AM   #37 (permalink)
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Quote:
b*tches love orange
my favorite

EDIT:
Ok wait, this has to be the best line:

Quote:
It literally oozes testosterone. So much so that its puddling up in the back.
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Old 11-04-2011, 12:51 AM   #38 (permalink)
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Quote:
Who doesn't like to get sideway?! Terrorists, thats who. Are you a terrorist? No? Then you need this car.
my favorite line.
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Old 11-04-2011, 12:58 AM   #39 (permalink)
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I could see this dude doing the above, it gets real good starting at 1:40
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T6L91rm9H3g
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Old 11-04-2011, 07:54 AM   #40 (permalink)
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Seats? this cocks*cker has got two. One for you, and one for the hot @ss broad thats gunna be all upons your **** after you buy this car. You're a girl? Sh*t works both ways. One seat for you, and one seat for that hot @ss dude you've been trying to hook up with for weeks. Deal with it,sh*ts getting serious.


I love that whole paragraph.
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Old 11-04-2011, 08:01 AM   #41 (permalink)
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Quote:
Originally Posted by nismodreamr View Post
fixed. inserted stereotypical canadian noise
cant count how many americans get a kick out of that over here in afghanistan.

Back on topic, that post was awesome
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Old 11-04-2011, 01:07 PM   #42 (permalink)
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It would be great to meet this guy... what an awesome ad

"This is the skyline God would drive" F'ing hilarious!!

"Done like dinner"
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Old 11-07-2011, 08:57 AM   #43 (permalink)
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i need him to come sell cars with me lmao
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Old 11-07-2011, 09:55 AM   #44 (permalink)
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holy crap! fucking LOL'd


and so we can remember it forever..
( Click to show/hide )
This isn't your normal skyline. This motherfcker is the skyline God would drive if he wasn't busy doing God sh*t like making tsunamis and crap. Its set up to go fast, and go fast sideways. Who doesn't like to get sideway?! Terrorists, thats who. Are you a terrorist? No? Then you need this car.

Handling? This car handles like a junior executive CEO. Go around corners like the devil himself is chasing you, and not give a fck.

Whats that? You like drifting? Well I've got some great god d@mn news for you. This car was a drift project of mine, and the last owner was planning on making it a drift machine too. Interior is for ******* so we got rid of it. Manly as fck. It literally oozes testosterone. So much so that its puddling up in the back.

Seats? this cocks*cker has got two. One for you, and one for the hot @ss broad thats gunna be all upons your **** after you buy this car. You're a girl? Sh*t works both ways. One seat for you, and one seat for that hot @ss dude you've been trying to hook up with for weeks. Deal with it,sh*ts getting serious.

Stereos and AC are for hippies. Fortunately this car has neither. Oh look at me, I like listen to Simon and Garfunkel and think about puppies. F*ck that. The only noises you're gunna be hearing is the ultra manly engine noises coming from this sweet turbocharged, intercooled, 24 valve inline 6. Sh*ts getting real, real f*cking fast.

This car has got a bright orange ebrake handle (b*tches love orange) with a drift button for those super ultra megahellatastic bar room brawler ebrake lockers. F*ck. Yes.

Now, I'll be honest. The wheels are a little lackluster, although everyones gunna be so focused on your super gangster drifting that nobody is going to give a f*ck about your sh*tty stock 16s. Don't worry, I've got you fcking covered. Its like we're in Vietnam and you just got ambushed by Charlie. Don't worry, friend, I've got your fcking back and I blow charlie to kingdom fcking come. For an extra $450 I can throw in some added p*ssy magnets for wheels, just don't come crawling back to me complaining that you're getting TOO much vajayjay. Bright fcking green 18s. Greens not your thing? Super legit silver 18s. Done like dinner.

This car has got 1.5 metric f*ck tons of awesome parts. Bride, Greddy, Brembo, the list doesn't f*cking END. It just keeps going and going, like the energizer bunny on speed.

You like going fast? Ever tried to outrun 24 police cars and 3 helicopters? You need this car. It will go so fcking fast that you may very well go back in time. It happened to me once. Just once, but it was fcking rad. Its like someone took a rocket and opened its mouth and poured steroids down its throat and and threatened to kill its family if it wasn't the fastest motherfcker you've ever driven.

I get it. You're busy, I'm busy, lets not waste time. If you're interested send me a message and I'll get back to you ASAP. You send me a message, I send you one right back. Thats how this works.

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