:bowrofl:

This was discussed a couple pages back. What about the ones who sued McDonalds for getting fat. :roflpuke2:

So sorry you weren't able to join us today. :rofl2:

A Charlotte, North Carolina man, having purchased a box of 24 rare and very expensive cigars, insured them against... fire. Within a month, having smoked his entire stockpile of fabulous cigars, and having yet to make a single premium payment on the policy, the man filed a claim against the insurance company.

In his claim, the man stated that he had lost the cigars in "a series of small fires." The insurance company refused to pay, citing the obvious reason: that the man had consumed the cigars in a normal fashion. The man sued, and won.

In delivering his ruling, the judge stated that the man held a policy from the company in which it was warranted that the cigars were insurable. The company, in the policy, had also guaranteed that it would insure the cigars against fire, without defining what it considered to be "unacceptable fire," and so, the company was obligated to compensate the insured for his loss. Rather than endure a lengthy and costly appeal process, the insurance company accepted the judge's ruling and paid the man $15,000 for the rare cigars he had lost in "the fires."

However, shortly after the man cashed his check, the insurance company had him arrested on 24 counts of arson. With his own insurance claim and testimony from the previous case used as evidence against him, the man was convicted of intentionally burning the rare cigars and sentenced to 24 consecutive one-year prison terms.

the insurance company basically said fck you lmao :icon18:

Pretty sure when our gauge starts flashing, we still have 3 gallons left.

LOL I missed out on all the fun...

LMAO Don't screw with the Darth Vader Insurance...

:iagree:

That story was hilarious. :icon17:

PHILADELPHIA, Pa. - A woman is suing the pharmacy that sold her a popular contraceptive jelly - because she ate the stuff on toast and got pregnant anyway.

And, incredibly, many legal experts are saying she's got an excellent chance of collecting!

"The woman is a complete idiot," said one attorney who asked that we not use his name. "How bright can you be if you think eating a vaginal gel will prevent conception?

"But certain aspects of the case involve truth in labeling and false advertising issues. She may not collect but she'll make a lot of noise and trouble. People are down on lawyers anyway. They think we waste time and money on frivolous lawsuits. This isn't going to help our public relations any."

A spokesman for the unnamed mom-and-pop drugstore says he's shocked and angry that such a case could ever be taken seriously. "All she has to do is open the box and read the directions," says the spokesman. "Next thing you know someone will come after us because they couldn't stick things together with their toothpaste.

"I can just imagine some moron saying: 'It's paste, isn't it? Why can't I glue these papers onto my bulletin board?' "

But attorneys for Mrs. Chyton say she was swindled and lied to by implication and they intend to make the pharmacy pay $500,000 for the hardship the woman will have to endure.

"It says right on it 'jelly,'" says Mrs. Chyton, a former model who was once a cheerleader for a popular professional basketball team.

"And they kept it on the shelf just two aisles from the food section. I know, now, that the directions say it should be used vaginally with a condom.

"But who has time to sit around reading directions these days - especially when you're sexually aroused?

"The company should call it something else and the pharmacy shouldn't sell it without telling each and every customer who buys it that eating it won't prevent you from getting pregnant."

As bizarre as it sounds, the pharmacy could wind up losing the lawsuit. "It's hard for businesses to avoid troublesome lawsuits," said another attorney.

"With the courts bending over backwards to please consumer groups, the temper of the times is perfect for these crackpots to bring legal action against businesses - even a moronic legal action like this."

:rofl2:

From the Chicago Tribune, 6/8/90:

Naples, Italy(AP): ...the claim (for damages) involves an accident in March involving a medium-sized Regatta and a tiny Panda car. The young man claimed he and his girlfriend were engaged in amorous activity in their car when the large car hit it from behind. The impact momentarily made them lose control, resulting in pregnancy. The suit demands compensation for the cost of repairing the Panda and the cost of the wedding the couple decided to have after discovering the woman was pregnant.

:icon18:

Where are you getting these?

The internet.

In May 1994, the Michigan Court of Appeals affirmed a lower court decision dismissing Richard Overton's $10,000 1991 lawsuit against Anheuser-Busch for false advertising. In the lawsuit, Overton had said he suffered physical and mental injury and emotional distress because the implicit promises in the company's advertisements, especially of success with women, did not materialize for him when he drank its product. Besides that, Overton contended, he sometimes got sick when he drank.

O rly? I thought you were scanning newspapers from all over the world and retyping the stories. :roflpuke2:

I meant are you just googling them or is there like a specific site that has a bunch of them.

it's been well documented from the beginning that the 370's gas gage is about
as ugly as one can get.God imagine what a decent looking needle gage would
look like in the 370!

As one member posted early set trip meter A to 0 fill up and when it gets to
300-350 fill up you tank. it doesn't take a lawyer to figure this one out......

google "dumb lawsuits" or "lawsuit jokes".

I was going to, but you did the work for me :roflpuke2:

there is a lot of that in our relationship:ugh2:

Trips filed a lawsuit against me for stealing his heart.

<3

:icon18:

I object!!!! :icon18:

The gas gauge is great compared to a Chevy z71 silverado. Pick ayear from 99 to 03, same shorted out fuel gauge that is attached to the pump and is a bitch to get to.

You could always open your gas tank and do the manual check, preferably with a bic lighter...

Lousy paint class action is the better bet. I still hope it will happen someday.

Oh, I thought that was their way of weaseling out of getting bitched at if it was cold.

You know...

"My coffee is cold!"

"Well, sir, it says the contents MAY be hot... "

;)

Snopes says both of these are false. *shrug*

snopes.com: Cigar Arson

snopes.com: Contraceptive Jelly on Toast

Both obviously fake. The cigar arson actually did have a similar case that it is based on.

:inoutroflpuke:

@b1adesofcha0s & Red__Zed
:icon18:

Brilliant, I believe I have a suggestion about the type of lighter, one with an elongated end for better viewing deeeeeeeep inside the tank. Please refer to pic at time of purchase...
http://www.labsafety.com/images/xl/E..._i_LB49613.jpg

Disclaimer: The use of illustrated elongated lighter in any gas tank whether full/empty is not susceptible for any lawsuit, leave it to dumb professionals. Thank you :tup:

http://i484.photobucket.com/albums/r...sion-300x2.jpg

Nice move with the disclaimer. With some of the guys in this thread, I guess you never know.

:bowrofl: you just never know dude.

Some of these guys might sue you if it didn't blow up as promised.

:bowrofl:

Shaitse!!! you are right :bowrofl: