Over 30 and still single, post here.

DIGItonium

Just try to keep nitpicking, prejudice, self negativity, etc., to an absolute minimum or zippo. It will be difficult, but you want to build a positive conversation environment so people you're around will feel comfortable talking to you. Just have some fun and show your funny side if you can. So maybe you don't drink... just make it funny. I get that all the time on days I chose not to drink, so I tell them I want to maintain my figure.

Not everything in life is a positive one, but I try to make it funny or poke fun at it instead of moping about it (or go out for drinks). So when people ask, I just talk about it a little bit without looking depressed and emo. I don't care. This might sound bad, but maybe I'll get the chance one day. It beats getting back with an ex.

__________________

DIGItonium

What the eff. Plan is to go visit this weekend, and she told some guy (that I know) is going to be there as well. He was her wedding date a few months ago, but no one knew if anything was going on. 5th wheel warning.

__________________

XiP

:|

I got tired of stuff like that so now I go into all my interactions with females as friends, no expectations = no letdown
I think it makes it a lot less tense because I talk about whatever I want like would with a guy friend

__________________
I <3 Frost!!!

DIGItonium

True. As bad as getting FZ'd sounds when meeting someone new, maybe some people (like me) have to start out that way at the beginning. This is definitely how nice guys finish last. I read about it, and basically I just have to play it cool.

That's what I've been doing recently, which is pace myself and not come off too pushy or desperate. That means taking my time to get to know the person. The difficult part is that she's obviously talking to others, so some guys can seal the deal quicker.

I've been first may times and leave it for others to get sloppy 2nds , so I could care less as long as she doesn't have VD or some other crazy sh*t or baggage when my turn comes around haha.

__________________

paperboy42190

I'm not 30 yet but I feel like I can relate. It is definitely annoying when friends check up on you and always ask "How's your love life?" "Do you have a gf?" etc etc I mean why is that always one of the main topics that come up? and sometimes they try to "help" out or give sympathetic advice.

http://www.buzzfeed.com/ashleyperez/...red-of-hearing

I do feel like having a relationship is overrated, not everyone needs one to be happy. Why do people in relationships get to "feel sorry" for people not in one?

Cmike2780

That's true, but I don't think most people who are in relationships "feel sorry" for people not in one. I think most people in happy relationships are genuine about why YOU should feel the same way. It's definitely an annoying topic, trust me... and it doesn't end when you're in a relationship either. The questions just change...when are you getting engaged?....when are you getting married?...when are you buying a house?...when are you having a baby?...when are you having another baby....it just goes on and on and on and on.... If you don't want any of that, it's totally fine, but those type questions shouldn't bother you if you never want to be in a committed relationship. My guess (and I've felt the same in the past) is that it makes you feel like crap when they ask.... like you're not trying or failed some societal norm. Some just say stuff like that because they have nothing else to say. For the most part, it's just rude. I'd fire right back with similarly uncomfortable question.

Forever alone isn't exactly a best case scenario for most people though.

__________________

[09][MB][6-Spd MT][Touring][Stillen Gen III][K&N][Borla CBE][Evo-R]

XiP

This! My family, friends, and coworkers keep asking me why I'm single and it makes me feel like I'm doing something wrong or supposed to be actively dating

__________________
I <3 Frost!!!

Ghostvette

DIGI, being FZ'd isn't too bad sometimes. I could be a typical Marine (rude, crude and socially unacceptable) without feeling like I had to impress her. She would ask what I did the night before, I'd tell her about any dates and how they went. It was actually funny to watch her reactions, she'd get mad when I said I had a good time or a little smug when I said the date didn't go so well. We taught karate together, so we had a ton of time to talk after the dojo closed. I got the impression she wanted to take the next step, but I was like 'no, you FZ'd me, so that's where you are staying'... that's where she still is, a friend that wishes she would have made the right choice. I'm enjoying my life, she had the chance and let it slide.

__________________
2015 Magma Red 6MT Sport Tech/2012 Fairlady MB 6MT Base (RIP 08032018)https://www.nicoclub.com/FSM/370Z/Coupe/

DIGItonium

[OFFTOPIC]Dude! Short road trip to KC this Saturday. I'll be attending KC Restaurant Week, and the girl I'm meeting up over there suggests Kill Devil Club.[/OFFTOPIC]

__________________

ElVee

Have to admit, whenever I see the title of this thread come up, I think back to a video George Sodini did:

George Sodini Home Video - Pittsburgh Gym Shooter - YouTube

It was pretty creepy finding the original up on YouTube shortly after the shooting. This isn't it, but does contain the full original inside it. From other news outlets, I guess the guy hadn't had sex in 19 years and was a little fixated on that. In the end, he was a very unhappy, angry person.

Cmike2780

Whoa!...that's a bit of a leap...

I don't think it's really fair to compare anyone here asking for advice to someone with mental issues.

__________________

[09][MB][6-Spd MT][Touring][Stillen Gen III][K&N][Borla CBE][Evo-R]

Bking

Interesting thread. I'm not single but I'm turning 30 very soon so here are my

Seems like some of you have relatively high standards. Keep in mind that intelligent and pretty single women with a nice personality and a good career are pretty hard to find. Unless you have the same qualities yourself, but then why would you still be single? But I digress...

It's not hard to pick up women, they are literally everywhere. If there are none that interests you within your work or social circle then you gotta look else where. You just gotta man up and go for it.

You see a cute girl studying/drinking coffee alone, i.e. without her SO, at Starbucks? Go talk to her. Worst comes to worst she will say no. Doesn't matter where the place is, a mall, a restaurant, a park, as long as you allow yourself to make the first move.

Clubs and bars are actually great places to find decent women; not all of them are sluts or "drunk whores", you just have to learn how to differentiate. A lot of them just want to have a fun night with their girl friends. Just go with a couple of buddies to help each other out when talking to them. They are usually in small groups so if you go solo they will most likely reject you.

DIGItonium

It's just the chemistry. I've met some cute single girls that I have no chemistry with. Then there are mediocre looking ones, but no one with real chemistry. A few I had some chemistry, but those girls are taken or married. Others has shown some attraction, but it's just not there with me. I get these vibes when I look into their eyes.

The one I met recently is pretty, but I didn't notice that when I first met her. My friends think she's quite hot, though. Interaction in person was great, outgoing, talkative, and I just get this really nice vibe with her. I was so pumped my workout and volleyball practice was better, and I was able to quickly implement new project ideas at work. It has been a long time since I've had such good vibes. Once she gave me the rejection speech I took it upon myself to hit the bars to have a few drinks and watch the KU and Iowa St. game, and had a couple more with some friends before calling it a night. Yesterday's volleyball practice tanked. I failed every other serve, and I barely had any opportunities to spike.

Maybe the chemistry was lost because when she found out I'm rooting for WSU Shox. She posted pics of her and her new beau wearing KU swag.

__________________

Bking

What kind of rejection speech did she give you?

DIGItonium

Over 30 and still single, post here.
Over 30 and still single, post here.

Keywords "for now." I kept it cool and thanked her for her time. That was it.

__________________