This thread was just getting good!

[RoadZter]

So I just responded in another thread about a guy having to sell his Z because his wife was mad at him and the darn thread got shut down. I for one can relate to this poor bastage because it took me almost 10 years to figure out how to get my wife to agree to let me have one! If you are married, I am sure you can relate. Getting a divorce is indeed more messy AND more expensive than following my 8 simple steps to Z ownership! I've posted them here in case you didn't see them on the other thread.

LEGAL CAVEAT: These steps in no way guarantee that your wife will allow you to buy and keep your Z. Every wife is different. Consult a wife/Z acquisition professional before starting this or any Z acquisition program.

HERE ARE THE STEPS!


Being married for...ahem, 20 years, I understand this guys pain having to sell his car. That said, I also figured out how to get my wife to offer the Z to me AND thank me for buying it. Here's what you do...

1. Pretend that you have no appetite and eat out before you get home. Say "I don't know what's wrong with me" a lot! MAKE SURE NOT TO LEAVE FOOD RECEIPTS IN YOUR POCKETS!!

2. Be sure to leave pics of a Z up on a website right before she uses the computer. Put the computer in hibernate so she has to turn it on, but when she does, she'll see what website you were looking at. MAKE SURE TO DELETE THE HISTORY OF PORN BEFORE YOU DO THAT!!! (see number 3)

3. Look at porn! Try to avoid having sex with your wife as much as possible. Looking at porn will remind you of what other women look like and will make you NOT want to have sex with your wife!!

4. Tell your wife that you love her but you are just so depressed with your life. You don't want to get old and you don't want to be 90 years old driving around in a Z. You want to enjoy life while you are young!

5. Once she says "go buy it", you will unequivocally have to visit the carpet store, know what I mean?

6. Buy the car and continue to give her affection while you both are signing the papers.

7. Discontinue 1-3 immediately! Thats right, NO MORE PORN! you will have to give her the sex she's been missing. It's tough but a small price to pay for a Z!

8. Consider that #4-7 are like part of your car payment. Don't vacillate between alternatives! Once you stop #4-7, YOUR NEW Z WILL BE REPOSSESSED LIKE THIS POOR GUYS WAS!

That's should get you married guys started. Good luck!