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The New "What did you do with your Z today" (with off topic replies) XXIX

Originally Posted by bunk Military joke. Miltiary maps are broken down into grids. When a new Private joins the unit, we send them off in search of said grid squares.

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Old 07-16-2018, 09:35 AM   #5716 (permalink)
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Military joke. Miltiary maps are broken down into grids. When a new Private joins the unit, we send them off in search of said grid squares. Usually, when they ask around, they keep getting sent off to other people who also know the joke, so the PVT spends all day in search of the non existent grid squares.

Theres also other variants. Enlisted Ranks are classified with an E (Enlisted) and a number E1 though E9. So well tell the pvt to go to the motorpool SGT (usually the rank of E7). Tell the pvt to ask the motorpool sgt for a PrcE7 (pronounced prick e7). We used to use PRC77 (or whatever number model) which were real radios, so PrcE7 sounds reasonable right? So imagine the furry when a private tells the motorpool sgt that hes looking for a PRICK E7..lol
That reminds me of what we did to a not real bright Marine SSGT (E6){besides the fact that Marines are known crayon eaters}. We sent said SSGT hunting for a ST-1 (stone/rock). After several stops at our unit (Marine Air Control Squadron 2), he got sent to H&MS (Headquarters and Maintenance Squadron) and then to MAG (Marine Air Group) headquarters... There he ran into the Group Sgt Major. where he got his azz chewed for falling for something so juvenile....
We caught hell at the club that night for that stunt... but man, it was hilarious.....
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Old 07-16-2018, 09:49 AM   #5717 (permalink)
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That reminds me of what we did to a not real bright Marine SSGT (E6){besides the fact that Marines are known crayon eaters}. We sent said SSGT hunting for a ST-1 (stone/rock). After several stops at our unit (Marine Air Control Squadron 2), he got sent to H&MS (Headquarters and Maintenance Squadron) and then to MAG (Marine Air Group) headquarters... There he ran into the Group Sgt Major. where he got his azz chewed for falling for something so juvenile....
We caught hell at the club that night for that stunt... but man, it was hilarious.....
Hahaha... poor guy. I always felt bad when the dupe runs into "That guy" that has no sense of humor...
My claim to fame: After active duty, I joined an Army Reserve Unit. We were on our monthly drill out at Camp Parks just training on basic Soldiering skills. I was appointed to be a Sunken Chest Wound victim while other soldiers were performing first aid on me. This was during the summer, full battle rattle on. I lost count of how many soldiers had gone through my station, but laying on my back pretending to be a casualty, I started dozing off.
Suddenly I hear this BOOMING Voice say "WHAT THE HECK DO WE HAVE HERE?". Open my eyes, about to yell at the human megaphone, then I see this Kevlar band with the word KIDD written on it, and above that, more Chevrons, leave, branches, stars etc that Ive ever seen on a rank. Command Sergent Major of the freakin Army Kidd looking down at me. LT, CO, Battalion Commander and CSM, and a photographer all around....Only thing I could think of was "Sergent Major of the Army! Im providing realistic training, as a real casualty would not be conscious and coherent!".... with that, SMA Kidd responded "OUTSTANDING! CARRY ON!" ...whew!
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Old 07-16-2018, 10:01 AM   #5718 (permalink)
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That reminds me of what we did to a not real bright Marine SSGT (E6){besides the fact that Marines are known crayon eaters}. We sent said SSGT hunting for a ST-1 (stone/rock). After several stops at our unit (Marine Air Control Squadron 2), he got sent to H&MS (Headquarters and Maintenance Squadron) and then to MAG (Marine Air Group) headquarters... There he ran into the Group Sgt Major. where he got his azz chewed for falling for something so juvenile....
We caught hell at the club that night for that stunt... but man, it was hilarious.....
lol... ST-ONE.. i get it.. Kinda like the ID10-T form
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Old 07-16-2018, 10:02 AM   #5719 (permalink)
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Hahaha... poor guy. I always felt bad when the dupe runs into "That guy" that has no sense of humor...
My claim to fame: After active duty, I joined an Army Reserve Unit. We were on our monthly drill out at Camp Parks just training on basic Soldiering skills. I was appointed to be a Sunken Chest Wound victim while other soldiers were performing first aid on me. This was during the summer, full battle rattle on. I lost count of how many soldiers had gone through my station, but laying on my back pretending to be a casualty, I started dozing off.
Suddenly I hear this BOOMING Voice say "WHAT THE HECK DO WE HAVE HERE?". Open my eyes, about to yell at the human megaphone, then I see this Kevlar band with the word KIDD written on it, and above that, more Chevrons, leave, branches, stars etc that Ive ever seen on a rank. Command Sergent Major of the freakin Army Kidd looking down at me. LT, CO, Battalion Commander and CSM, and a photographer all around....Only thing I could think of was "Sergent Major of the Army! Im providing realistic training, as a real casualty would not be conscious and coherent!".... with that, SMA Kidd responded "OUTSTANDING! CARRY ON!" ...whew!
Lol way to think on your feet! err - back!
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Old 07-16-2018, 10:07 AM   #5720 (permalink)
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Yeah, the Battalion Sergent Major looked like he had just laid a ten pound bowel movement of relief when the SMA smiled and turned away..hehe
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Old 07-16-2018, 11:45 AM   #5721 (permalink)
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just read an article of an interview on the next GT-R. it may have the best quote ever about the GT-R in general.

“It doesn’t care what every other supercar in the world is doing; it simply says: ‘I’m a GT-R, I’m a brick, catch me.’ It’s the world’s fastest brick, really. And when I review sketches for the new car, I say that a lot: “Less wing, more brick.'”
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Old 07-16-2018, 01:26 PM   #5722 (permalink)
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Running errands and mgr just sent text for meeting at 3pm on my day off. Frack, have to go across town but, it is nothing bad, its about doing self eval this year w some new methodology blah blah blah.

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Old 07-16-2018, 04:03 PM   #5723 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by bunk View Post
Hahaha... poor guy. I always felt bad when the dupe runs into "That guy" that has no sense of humor...
My claim to fame: After active duty, I joined an Army Reserve Unit. We were on our monthly drill out at Camp Parks just training on basic Soldiering skills. I was appointed to be a Sunken Chest Wound victim while other soldiers were performing first aid on me. This was during the summer, full battle rattle on. I lost count of how many soldiers had gone through my station, but laying on my back pretending to be a casualty, I started dozing off.
Suddenly I hear this BOOMING Voice say "WHAT THE HECK DO WE HAVE HERE?". Open my eyes, about to yell at the human megaphone, then I see this Kevlar band with the word KIDD written on it, and above that, more Chevrons, leave, branches, stars etc that Ive ever seen on a rank. Command Sergent Major of the freakin Army Kidd looking down at me. LT, CO, Battalion Commander and CSM, and a photographer all around....Only thing I could think of was "Sergent Major of the Army! Im providing realistic training, as a real casualty would not be conscious and coherent!".... with that, SMA Kidd responded "OUTSTANDING! CARRY ON!" ...whew!
Always hated when they used the word OUTSTANDING!. You knew you was caught, and it's all BS.
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Old 07-16-2018, 04:04 PM   #5724 (permalink)
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Originally Posted by FPenvy View Post
just read an article of an interview on the next GT-R. it may have the best quote ever about the GT-R in general.

“It doesn’t care what every other supercar in the world is doing; it simply says: ‘I’m a GT-R, I’m a brick, catch me.’ It’s the world’s fastest brick, really. And when I review sketches for the new car, I say that a lot: “Less wing, more brick.'”
I read that article too.
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Old 07-16-2018, 04:11 PM   #5725 (permalink)
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Running errands and mgr just sent text for meeting at 3pm on my day off. Frack, have to go across town but, it is nothing bad, its about doing self eval this year w some new methodology blah blah blah.

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As long as its paid hours. One of my clients likes to have a bi weekly conference call when I'm not scheduled to do work for them. I charge for the hour even if is only a 15 min call
My last "real job" used to pay us 250 just for being on call for the week.

Would you have gotten in trouble if you couldnt make the meeting?
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Old 07-16-2018, 04:13 PM   #5726 (permalink)
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I read that article too.
that sentence had me laughing at work. got some odd looks lol
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Yes, they are Tony approved! Frank, when I get around to it, I may put your pipes into production. We will call them, "The FP" option.
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Old 07-16-2018, 04:14 PM   #5727 (permalink)
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FINELY got some rain this afternoon, first rain in 18 days!
Yeah it helps around the house but it's the farmers that really needed it
to the people who grow our food!
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Old 07-16-2018, 04:16 PM   #5728 (permalink)
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Always hated when they used the word OUTSTANDING!. You knew you was caught, and it's all BS.
It's funny how it seemed anyone at least 3 levels above you in the chain of command, were always the hardest on you no matter what rank you were Anything higher than that and they seem to be the nicest people in the world...
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Old 07-16-2018, 04:38 PM   #5729 (permalink)
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I almost witnessed 3 accidents within a span of the 5 minute drive on my lunch break. A majority of Cali drivers astound me with how bad of drivers they are. Makes me scared every time i get in the car
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Old 07-16-2018, 04:42 PM   #5730 (permalink)
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I almost witnessed 3 accidents within a span of the 5 minute drive on my lunch break. A majority of Cali drivers astound me with how bad of drivers they are. Makes me scared every time i get in the car
What scares me even more are the number of UNINSURED motorists out there
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