From your list I've shot the the:
Sig P220
Springfield XD-9 (also shot the XD-45)
Glock 17
Of the three, I really enjoyed the XD-9 (actually the XD-45 the most). I have big hands and found the Glock a bit small. Of the Sig P220 and Springfield XD-45, I felt that the XD had less recoil and was more comfortable to shoot.
If I had to get a home defense handgun, it would be a XD-45. It packs more stopping power than the 9mm and I didn't feel much of a difference in terms of recoil. Check out the XDm's they are nicer than the regular XD's and would pick one up in a heartbeat if California allowed them.
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