I had to break away the really thin plastic that surrounds the base. This exposed where the relay & base joined and I just pried the connection between the two gently to start it & then it was easy to pull apart. Did the same with PWM/fan relay & swapped the two which cleared the p1091 code & car rev's normally. Now waiting for two new relays, 25230-9F915, to come in so I can replace the bad & the old one and keep the old relay for a spare. The two relays are identical.
I never found the mythical release clips.
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