Went for a run today and a 300lb woman on a mobility chair coming out of a side street turned the corner in front of me and cut me off.
I pulled up alongside and gave her the "oh really?" look. She threw me the stink eye and it was on. This chair was a sleeper.... man did it have some legs on it!
I could barely keep up with her when the road started going down hill and then the next thing I knew, she was putting chair lengths on me like nobody's business.

Until we meet again, granny. Next time, we race uphill.