Originally Posted by ZBro16

This reminds me of a story about my youth.

In my heyday, I was a bit of a dreamer. I had this idea about setting your mind to something and being able to accomplish it, no matter how ridiculous or absurd my friends and acquaintences thought the idea to be.

I always had a fascination with movies, particularly spy movies like James Bond or Die Hard movies where a donut-eating NYC cop could take out a Russian terrorist supercell single handedly. Or the car movies where this blond guy drag races an Eclipse and accidentally gets upgraded to a Supra. (The sequel about him trading the Supra for a Cavalier and accomplishing the same feats never came about - something about a script revision not making the cut. Oh what could have been!)

Anyway, I'm terrible with tangents.

I decided that, when I stumbled upon this little gem Al Gore created called the Internet, I could make dreams into reality for anyone that used it. People could post pictures (ANY pictures) and tell stories about their own personal outlook and perception of their lives and convey them to the world. Anyone could sign up, enter their age and gender, create a nickname for themselves and VOILA!

I made a test account first and uploaded pictures of my Ferrari, then pictures of my 18 girlfriends. Instantly famous? Perhaps in a way. I invited people to join and they came in droves. Contingency? They would be my friend. I would be the center of my own little space on the internet.

So before you ask me, "Tom, why on earth do you have 18 girlfriends?" Before you let logic overwhelm you to the point of pilfering through my photo albums and choking on the realization that I am the only person missing from the photos of women in my album "girlfriends", I ask you, in turn, "Bro, because racecar."

I implore you to be on the lookout for my new photos of my Civic Si (I traded in my Pagani for it because daily driver, and the Si is going to go up in value soon once people realize I drive one). Don't look for my website anymore, though. Some guy Timberlake bought it and deleted all my pictures. Because Social Network.