I was a dumba$$ last night and checked the dipstick while the car was still up on jack stands. I spent nearly an hour this morning siphoning out about 1/2 Qt. of oil
The only thing I found that would work to siphon was some narrow hard plastic tubing I had for my refrigerator water connection. It worked well, it was just slow as Mu's sperm
Good news, though, the first 1/4 Qt. of the siphoned oil was black and nasty and must have been the leftover oil that isn't able to drain from the pan
The remaining oil I removed looked much cleaner. I left it at the high mark on the dipstick so I could probably stand to get rid of a bit more. However, I don't really have the time this week. Does anyone think it's critical enough that I make time to siphon some more?