Let me ask you a question... am I misunderstanding you or did you bring the parts to the shop without the car for the first 3 times. 75% of shops won't paint a body part without the car to make sure it blends and the 25% that will do not guarantee the paint matches.
Usually they will take the car and paint the parts off of it to make sure all the seams are hit correctly but it will assist them in matching the paint. Just spraying it the paint code generally is not enough.
If you decide to take it somewhere else, don't ask your friend to remove the parts... bring everything to the shop and ask them to blend it. You are going to have to temporarily lose your car and pay more for the labor, its part of the game.
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