Update:
-Window reset did in fact cure the door sticking issue.
-Wheel is being replaced
...
...
-Aaaaand now it's looking like the whole front spoiler assembly + "air diffuser" piece beneath it are going to have to be replaced. They messed with it all day and eventually called me and said, "so uh, we're going to call your insurance company again".
It's the beetle for me.
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