Originally Posted by wstar

It sounds like either you or her (or both) aren't prepared for the sort of stable relationship you're envisioning and trying for. At the very least you need to re-examine your expectations with reference to reality. You might be able to find a happy medium where you tone down your expectations, and instead of an on-again/off-again headbanging cycle of breakups, you could just settle into a relationship that's lighter in its time and/or exclusivity requirements. If on careful re-examination you don't think you can handle that in the long term, then just get out for good and save yourself some trouble.

Relationships are not about possession or conquest, they're about two people actively wanting the same thing from the relationship. If you both have the same expectations and desires, there's no reason for the cyclic breakups.